What happens when you have to take care of your parents? It’s almost expected of the child/children to care for their parents when the time comes. However, what happens when that time comes to early. This happened to me on August 19, 2017, when my father had a massive stroke.
I woke up to four missed phone calls and multiple missed text messages. What I understood was that something was very wrong with my dad. He had a massive stroke. I cannot tell you when he actually had the stroke. From what little the “roommate” told us and what others have said it was two days prior he had the stroke.
It was massive. It had done significant damage to his brain. The left side of his brain has a concrete-like wall in it. This is preventing him from a lot of speech. We can get a yes or no out of him. He has zero movements to the right side of his body. He cannot eat or swallow which means the hospital put a tube in his stomach.
In September of 2016, I had an interesting talk with my dad. I told him that if anything were to happen to him that I would be responsible for him. We had this same talk early in August of 2017 when I came out to help him due to his appendix.
I am beyond thankful for my baby sister (she is my sister through our mother) and her wonderful husband. They dropped the money for me to come out and see my dad. He lives in Arizona and I now live in Tennessee. That would be the last time I will see my dad in a normal condition.
The weekend before the stroke I spent a long hour on the phone with my dad. I reminded him to take care of himself and that if anything happens that I am responsible for him. Never in my wildest dreams would I expect at the age of 33 that I would come true.
That is the first and only image I have of my father in the hospital. When I was able to see him for Christmas that was not what I got. He looked like an adult baby.
From the time he went into the hospital my world changed. I became his medical power of attorney. I then had to help my Aunt and Uncle remove the not so nice roommates out of my dads home.
We evicted them. Upon my return to Phoenix, I knew I would have to go through what was left of my father’s belongings. I’m thankful I didn’t expect much. The roommates either sold, trashed, or took a lot of things. It’s a sad thing what people can do to each other.
As of this year, I have dealt with Social Security, the VA, courts, and the state of Arizona, plus Capital One. As of now, I am my dad’s guardian.
It sucks to be living so far away. I do my best. As of current, I have my wonderful uncle and cousin as my eyes. It was wonderful that I was able to video call with them. They let me see my dad. It only lasted a few minutes but was better than nothing.
You will never know when your world will be turned upside down. You just have to stay positive and keep going forward.